My cousin-in-law (is that an official title?) just had her little boy at 26.5 weeks. That's pretty nerve-wracking. I understand a little of that fear. I went into labor the morning that I turned 30 weeks. When we got to the hospital and they told me that I was pretty much totally effaced and dilated to a 4 and contractions were only 2 minutes apart my heart sunk. When my water broke and I was rushed in for an emergency c-section I was sobbing, terrified about what the world would hold for my tiny premature boys. We quickly were immersed in a world I knew nothing about. The NICU. Phrases, words, etc. were tossed around that I had never heard. My children were hooked up to all sorts of machinery and monitors and were constantly being poked and prodded with needles. This was not was I signed up for. You can't exactly ask a nurse to explain to you what's wrong with your child as they are rushing to put a bag of ice on his face to bring his heart rate down from 250. There are a lot of unknowns, a LOT of tears, and a lot of prayers when your baby is in the NICU. Here are just a few tips from me, a Mom who was in two separate NICUs with 3 lb twins.
*Take care of yourself. If you don't, you'll end up back in the hospital and won't be able to see your babies at all. Take the time to recover so that when your baby finally does come home, you will be able to enjoy it. Sleep, eat, drink...it's hard when you are so busy pumping, holding, driving, worrying, etc., but it's necessary.
*Go on dates with your husband. It is REALLY awful to tear yourself away from the NICU, but you must do it. It's the only time in your life you will have such qualified babysitters. Take a night out and see a movie, go to a fancy restaurant, whatever. We went on a few dates and it was amazing how helpful it really was.
*Buy a special bra that holds the pumping gear in place so that you can read, write a blog entry, surf the internet, knit, etc. Those pumping sessions are terrible, especially if you have a low milk supply (aka me) and have to pump for 30 minutes every 2 hours in order to get enough to feed ONE of your babies. You need to keep yourself sane.
*Take pictures and videos of your baby. They will be such treasured memories later, if you can believe that. They will LOVE those pictures some day and will be showing them off to their friends at recess.
*Buy this book: Preemies. It is AMAZING. It is so helpful when you have questions about procedures or terms people are throwing around. It walks you through surgeries your child might have to have and even walks you through the coming home part. It was our best purchase and was a huge help when our son had to have emergency surgery.
*Document the ups and the downs. It is incredible to go back and read through our blog posts about the boys. I wrote every single day (it was a big help to me so that I didn't have to explain everything a million times).
*Pray. Our faith in God and Jesus Christ is what really got us through this experience. We witnessed miracles every single day. Pray and thank your Father in Heaven for the miracles you see.
*It's okay to tell visitors no. When you only get to hold your baby for 30 minutes a day (if that), it's okay to be selfish and take that time for yourself. Let people know when they can come, if they can hold the baby, etc. You need to be honest, otherwise there will be issues. Trust me.
*Do not be afraid to speak up. If there is a nurse you don't get along with or that you don't feel comfortable leaving your child with--tell the Head Nurse. If there is a nurse you really like, request her to be your primary nurse. Our primary nurses were a huge blessing to both us and our babies. We still communicate with them today. It is really nice to see a familiar, loving face.
*Read their binder (it's by the bedside). You are their Mom, it's okay. There is a lot of great information in there--weight, history, etc.
*If you have a question, ASK. Ask the RN, ask the OPT, ask the Neonatalogist, ASK. After a month in the NICU we finally learned this skill. If there was a head ultrasound that we didn't understand, we made an appointment with the Neonatologist. You'll find these a very helpful! Get to know the people--it is a big help.
*Make friends with the people around you. There are so many incredible parents with their children in the NICU and their stories will probably make you pretty grateful for your own trial. Get to know them, serve them, and you will find that your trips to the NICU will be a little brighter.
*Talk to people. A lot of people do not understand the issues associated with twins. Educate people. Communicate. If you need dinners, ask. Don't be afraid--people will want to help. We had dinners brought in once a week and it was a HUGE life saver.
*Take this opportunity to learn about preemies. It's amazing the things you can learn.
*Look ahead knowing that this really WILL end. There might still be struggles, but you won't be in the NICU forever.
*Call the nurse at any time if you have questions, concerns, or you just miss your baby. We would call every single night to check on our boys before we could go to sleep.
*BUY SOME LOTION. Your hands and arms will get so chapped from washing constantly. Mine still haven't recovered. Apply lotion after every washing, it will help.
*It's okay to cry and feel overwhelmed, but don't allow yourself to compare your life with others. Everyone has different trials. A phrase we learned to say was "Give me this mountain." It is from this talk. It means to accept your personal trials and to conquer them.
*Read this. It helped us through a lot.
*Find something to do when you can't hold your baby. Read a book, write in your journal, crochet a blanket for them, etc. This will make the time not seem as painful.
*Do the little things for them that you CAN do--change their diapers, bathe them, feed them, etc.
*Don't get down on yourself if you can't breastfeed. It was so hard for me that I was only able to give milk to one baby and not the other. Realize that you are doing the best you can. Both babies ended up on formula after 3 months and they turned out JUST FINE.
That's what I can think of for now. My heart goes out to anyone who is going through this. We know that we had it pretty easy as far as the NICU goes, but with 2 surgeries, SVTs, brain cysts, RSV scares, 2 different hospitals, etc., we also know what a roller coaster the NICU can be. Email with any questions. We are here to help.
Twincubators
All about life with our preemie twins
Sunday, January 16, 2011
Monday, December 6, 2010
Bedrest
When I was not quite 27 weeks along my doctor requested that I get an ultrasound, just to make sure everything was alright with the boys. My husband was out of town on business (as usual) and so my dear little sister came along with me. Everything looked great with the boys, they were growing well and seemed healthy...but then the tech got quiet. Never something you want to have happen. She mentioned that my cervix seemed a little short (I had no idea what that meant) and she went to tell my doctor. My doctor immediately pulled me into one of the rooms and checked everything out. I was 80% effaced. He was not too thrilled. He told me to quit my job and to go on modified bed rest. I was devastated. As a sixth grade teacher, quitting your job is not easy or possible. So the next day I drove to my school, got a substitute, and tried to arrange for a 16 week substitute for my class. Luckily, I had been pretty inspired (call it motherly intuition, call it luck, call it being prepared, I call it the spirit) to write sub plans that began the first week of February. Amazingly enough, it was the very end of January when I was put on bed rest. I simply had to refine my plans and add a bit more detail. I picked my husband up from the airport and then bed rest began. I was allowed to sit up, get up to grab some lunch, go on a date with my husband, etc. On Monday I went to the doctor again only to discover I was now 90% effaced and dilating (I was at a 1). I was put on strict bed rest (only allowed to get up to go to the bathroom and take a bath). I thought it was the end of the world. Not only because I had to lay in bed all day long, but because my babies were coming way too early. I never once broke my bed rest rules. My family/friends were incredible and helped me out every single day. My husband also stepped right up to the plate and was a complete angel. I also picked quite a few projects to keep me busy and that was a huge help. So, here is my advice for those who have to go on bed rest:
-Don't be afraid to ask for help. People are so willing to help. Meals, cleaning the house, taking care of other children, simply keeping you company, grocery shopping, etc. You need help--ask for it and accept it, and be grateful for it.
-Pick several projects that you CAN do. Here are a few ideas: crochet/knit items for your baby (I made each of the boys their own afghan), sew a quilt (I not only sewed it while laying down but I also quilted it by hand), learn a new skill (buy a book about photography, quilting, knitting, photoshop, etc.), work on a blog book, write a blog, write a book, read an exciting book series (i.e. Uglies, Twilight, Hunger Games, Harry Potter, etc), tie quilts/make things for a local shelter, make a scrapbook, write detailed lesson plans for your sixth grade class, keep a journal for your baby, read a college textbook and learn something new, make a felt busy book for your baby, put together your favorite recipes into a cookbook. Lots of things!
-Get a wedge for your legs so that you can put them up. Lying on your side for hours and hours sure hurts.
-Get/make plenty of rice packs to heat up and put on your legs, back, whatever aches that day.
-Keep in mind how important this is for your baby. It helps you keep a positive attitude.
-Make a bed on a couch in your house and go there every once in a while for a change of scenery.
-Get dressed and put on make-up and do your hair in the morning (it's tricky while in bed...but it really helps). It really makes the day feel brighter.
-Open the blinds. Look outside. It's pretty. Enjoy it!
-Buy a tray for food/laptop. I hated spilling food all over the place. Also, my camelback water bottle SAVED me--drinking from a cup is a pain while laying down.
-Invite friends over for a get together. You can watch a movie, play games, etc. while you are laying down. It's a good way to change things up.
-Get yummy take-out with your husband.
-Subscribe to netflix and pick out some favorite movies. Watch an interesting series.
-Dress up when you get to go to the doctor and take advantage of your own trip out a week--it's very exciting.
-Most of all--follow the rules. They are for your safety and your baby's.
Friday, December 3, 2010
Twin Santas

Thursday, December 2, 2010
FAQ about Twin Pregnancy
Here are answers to a few of the questions I commonly am asked about my pregnancy with the twins:
Do all twin moms have to go on bedrest?
Nope. My neighbor has triplets AND twins and carried both sets to term (38 weeks) and never had any bed rest. Other friends of mine have done the same. It is completely dependent on the mom and the pregnancy.
Were you sicker for this pregnancy?
Well, considering the fact that I have never been pregnant before, I couldn't say. However, my symptoms were extremely easy compared to most pregnant women so I truly think it, again, is dependent on the mom and the pregnancy. Another neighbor of mine is much sicker with her twins right now than she was with her first baby, but that can happen to any mom. I did get migraines with the twins, which I never had before.
How much weight did you gain?
I only made it to 30 weeks gestation with my twins, so my weight gain isn't exactly helpful. But, I gained 30 pounds with my twins. I started showing at about 12 weeks and got bigger and bigger each day :). My mother-in-law constantly reminded me of that fact when she would say "Wow, you look 7 months pregnant" when I was only 5 months along. Not necessary :).
Were the doctor appointments different?
Again, I don't have my own pregnancies to compare this too--but I do have 4 sisters who have children so I can compare it to them. I got to have ultrasounds at every single appointment, unlike most pregnant women. I also always measured a lot bigger than women with one baby. We did a lot of discussion about preemies and stress and stuff that probably isn't discussed as much in singleton appointments. Also, at 29 weeks I started going for stress tests (which were going to happen every week).
Were you allowed to work out?
I was not. I was allowed to walk (but not too fast) and swim (but not too fast). I spent a lot of time walking in the pool at our neighborhood gym. It felt so nice to feel the pressure relieved and to be doing a little exercise.
Did you continue working?
I was a sixth grade teacher and worked up until my 27th week when I was put on bed rest. Perhaps this is part of the reason I went into premature labor--it was a high stress, high energy job and I may have pushed it a little hard. However, I loved it and still feel sad I left my students so early.
How was it to have 2 babies moving inside of you?
It was so much fun to feel the interactions so early. I remember distinctly when Owen was kicking Isaac like crazy one night. Owen was ALWAYS our active baby and Isaac was much less so (and so their personalities have continued). Well, after about 30 minutes of being kicked Isaac had had enough and I felt this HUGE kick that you could see on my stomach. There was quite a lull in movement for a few moments after that! It was tricky when one would be up in my ribcage and the other would be down near my pelvis--that was pretty uncomfortable, but it really was amazing.
Did you know if they were fraternal or identical when you were pregnant?
We were pretty positive they were fraternal because of our infertility treatments. They were also in two separate sacks. However, that doesn't always mean they are fraternal. If they share a sack they are ALWAYS identical--but if they are separate it could mean they are identical or fraternal.
Did you want 2 boys, 2 girls, or 1 boy and 1 girl?
I was really hoping to have a boy and a girl. I had always thought that was the perfect combination. Of course, when I found out it was 2 boys I was thrilled and knew that it was just the way it was supposed to be, but I am still hoping for a little girl someday. I am so thrilled that the boys will always have each other though, and have loved every second of the baby boy lifestyle :).
Any other questions?
Do all twin moms have to go on bedrest?
Nope. My neighbor has triplets AND twins and carried both sets to term (38 weeks) and never had any bed rest. Other friends of mine have done the same. It is completely dependent on the mom and the pregnancy.
Were you sicker for this pregnancy?
Well, considering the fact that I have never been pregnant before, I couldn't say. However, my symptoms were extremely easy compared to most pregnant women so I truly think it, again, is dependent on the mom and the pregnancy. Another neighbor of mine is much sicker with her twins right now than she was with her first baby, but that can happen to any mom. I did get migraines with the twins, which I never had before.
How much weight did you gain?
I only made it to 30 weeks gestation with my twins, so my weight gain isn't exactly helpful. But, I gained 30 pounds with my twins. I started showing at about 12 weeks and got bigger and bigger each day :). My mother-in-law constantly reminded me of that fact when she would say "Wow, you look 7 months pregnant" when I was only 5 months along. Not necessary :).
Were the doctor appointments different?
Again, I don't have my own pregnancies to compare this too--but I do have 4 sisters who have children so I can compare it to them. I got to have ultrasounds at every single appointment, unlike most pregnant women. I also always measured a lot bigger than women with one baby. We did a lot of discussion about preemies and stress and stuff that probably isn't discussed as much in singleton appointments. Also, at 29 weeks I started going for stress tests (which were going to happen every week).
Were you allowed to work out?
I was not. I was allowed to walk (but not too fast) and swim (but not too fast). I spent a lot of time walking in the pool at our neighborhood gym. It felt so nice to feel the pressure relieved and to be doing a little exercise.
Did you continue working?
I was a sixth grade teacher and worked up until my 27th week when I was put on bed rest. Perhaps this is part of the reason I went into premature labor--it was a high stress, high energy job and I may have pushed it a little hard. However, I loved it and still feel sad I left my students so early.
How was it to have 2 babies moving inside of you?
It was so much fun to feel the interactions so early. I remember distinctly when Owen was kicking Isaac like crazy one night. Owen was ALWAYS our active baby and Isaac was much less so (and so their personalities have continued). Well, after about 30 minutes of being kicked Isaac had had enough and I felt this HUGE kick that you could see on my stomach. There was quite a lull in movement for a few moments after that! It was tricky when one would be up in my ribcage and the other would be down near my pelvis--that was pretty uncomfortable, but it really was amazing.
Did you know if they were fraternal or identical when you were pregnant?
We were pretty positive they were fraternal because of our infertility treatments. They were also in two separate sacks. However, that doesn't always mean they are fraternal. If they share a sack they are ALWAYS identical--but if they are separate it could mean they are identical or fraternal.
Did you want 2 boys, 2 girls, or 1 boy and 1 girl?
I was really hoping to have a boy and a girl. I had always thought that was the perfect combination. Of course, when I found out it was 2 boys I was thrilled and knew that it was just the way it was supposed to be, but I am still hoping for a little girl someday. I am so thrilled that the boys will always have each other though, and have loved every second of the baby boy lifestyle :).
Any other questions?
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Pregnant with Twins?
I was born with defects. All there is to it. I have PCOS (polycystic ovarian syndrome) and Endometriosis. I was diagnosed with Endometriosis before I got married and so we knew, going into our marriage, that getting pregnant might be difficult. Also, throughout my life I constantly felt sick after certain meals or treats and we could never figure it out. We tried everything...food diaries, lactose intolerance, etc. When we tried to get pregnant and it wasn't working out, my sister-in-law told me to look into PCOS. I had quite a few of the symptoms: irregular periods, weight gain due to birth control hormones, facial hair, etc. My OBGYN did not share our diagnosis of PCOS however and put me on Clomid. I took Clomid (50, 100, and then 150) for 3 cycles (which ended up taking about 6 months due to my irregularity). He then referred me to a fertility specialist. Almost the minute we walked into the specialist's office, he diagnosed me with PCOS. He put me on metformin and after about 6 months I ovulated for the first time. One week after we found out, from my progesterone count, that I had ovulated, we found out that I was pregnant. I had quite a few friends tell me that they wanted to go on Clomid so that they could get pregnant with twins. I had never thought of that, I just wanted to get pregnant. One of my friends even bought Clomid on ebay so that she could get twins (it didn't work by the way) :). You only have a 5% chance of getting pregnant with twins on Clomid. I myself was on Clomid, Metformin, Femara, and progesterone supplements when I got pregnant.
People constantly ask how I knew I was pregnant with twins. There are a few signs that made us suspicious. After taking a home pregnancy test we got a blood test (to test the HCG levels) at the fertility specialist. My HCG level was double that of a normal pregnant woman. That doesn't necessarily mean you are pregnant with twins, but it could. Also, I was on fertility drugs, so I knew there was a chance. Some people say your pregnancy symptoms are worse when you are pregnant with twins--however, I was actually less sick than most people with a singleton pregnancy. Lastly, my husband had major intuition that I was having twins. He would say prayers every night for "the babieS." When I was 7 weeks along we went in for an ultrasound to detect if there was more than one fetus since I had been on fertility medication. I was terrified that they wouldn't find any heartbeat. The doctor asked why I was nervous and I told him I just hoped the baby was okay. As he began the ultrasound (it was a vaginal ultrasound) he said "oh, I know why you are nervous." I was terrified. He then followed it with, "see those two little sacks? Those are your twins." My husband and I burst into tears. It was the best news we could have received. I was shocked, he was happy to be right :). So, there you have it. Pregnant with twins.
People constantly ask how I knew I was pregnant with twins. There are a few signs that made us suspicious. After taking a home pregnancy test we got a blood test (to test the HCG levels) at the fertility specialist. My HCG level was double that of a normal pregnant woman. That doesn't necessarily mean you are pregnant with twins, but it could. Also, I was on fertility drugs, so I knew there was a chance. Some people say your pregnancy symptoms are worse when you are pregnant with twins--however, I was actually less sick than most people with a singleton pregnancy. Lastly, my husband had major intuition that I was having twins. He would say prayers every night for "the babieS." When I was 7 weeks along we went in for an ultrasound to detect if there was more than one fetus since I had been on fertility medication. I was terrified that they wouldn't find any heartbeat. The doctor asked why I was nervous and I told him I just hoped the baby was okay. As he began the ultrasound (it was a vaginal ultrasound) he said "oh, I know why you are nervous." I was terrified. He then followed it with, "see those two little sacks? Those are your twins." My husband and I burst into tears. It was the best news we could have received. I was shocked, he was happy to be right :). So, there you have it. Pregnant with twins.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
And so it begins...
When I was pregnant with my twins, I searched all over the internet to try to find some sort of blog with advice, daily anecdotes, etc. about having twins. I couldn't find anything. Thus, the idea for this blog began. I am not a talented writer, nor am I a talented mother. However, I do have twins, I do learn new things every day, and I feel that maybe someone might enjoy reading about these things. So, since we might be friends for some time, allow me to introduce myself. My name will remain as just Mom. That's what I am, and that's what I will be known as for the majority of my life, so I'm alright with that being my name. I have twin baby boys. Their names are Isaac and Owen. They were the product of many infertility treatments and prayers. Then they surprised us by arriving at 30 weeks gestation. Quite the shocker to our systems. This blog is all about our experience raising these two. I hope that someone can find something useful in it. Please send emails to multipleblissmom@gmail.com if you have any questions, advice, or comments. I'd love to hear it. Let's get started!
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